Feelings

yeah,now working at power english centre
she gets angry again.]
i look at the students,waiting to call their parents
i wanted to cry,i don't know why
but the feelings just appeared
haih,but she really said nothing wrong
i saw one of the essays,it was poor
out of vocabulary
my english is sucks too
and my self-determination is weak
i have no stamina to complete or persist to do something
what a failure
i always get angry on myself..
yeah,lack of confidence
i admit it
it has been one year since we broke up
memories still filled up my mind
even though i'm just walking in a night market
not that i haven't let her go
it just memories that treasure in my deep heart
somehow,i wish to leave here and let my mind take a rest
urge is never fulfill
u will be craving more
this is what a man is except for gods of course.

Someone spoilt my mood and that was my mother

we talked about going to the curve yesterday night

and she agreed that we go

but today,what she did was yell!

:isn't sister wanted to go to the curve?

everyone in this house is waiting for your command

but still u havent prepared anything and gave sister a scold?!

u should have informed sister that you aren't going

everyone is waiting for you

and you just gave a scold to sister and father

how could you treat your husband in such a way!

how can you scolded him when he did nothing wrong?!

how can you scolded him when he didn't know what is going on?

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

somehow i just dreamt of left this house without leaving any message

i think before to live in my friend's house or go to her house to stay for a moment

but how could i do that to hurt my family

in this life u can't just live by your own

you have to think of many things

all kinds of relationship,money,all kinds of stuff

what a FFking feelings i had!

听着那段录音，

泪流了下来

我真的是个感性的人吗？

可是，整个情绪被那段录音给操控着了。

猪头
生日快乐
这是我第一次愿意着手去做蛋糕
虽然只是买材料然后铺在蛋糕上面
但，我还是失败了
够力笨蛋
嗯
谢谢你的陪伴
我很安心

忽然又想起和他的事
泪又出来了
哈哈
我真傻
猪头饼
那天和你妈通话
你妈问我要不要去她的学院读书
哈哈
若情况没变我的答案还是会坚决地拒绝吧
笨蛋
我是想你了啊
可，再也回不去了不是吗？
呵呵
尽量把自己抛得远远
尽情地忙着
如果有机会
我宁愿天天加班
呵呵
或许我真的不够好吧

01.01.2012

A WHOLE NEW LIFE!!!

REACHED SG.WANG AT 1PM AND MET PUIYU,SIEW CHING,WAN ER,LOKYEE
WENT TO FARENHEIT AND LOOK FOR HUIYING WHO WORK AT 2ND FLOOR
THEN WENT TO PAVILLION TO BUY YING HUA'S BIRTHDAY PRESENT
WE PLAN TO BUY A WATCH FOR HER AT FIRST
BUT IT WAS TOO EXPENSIVE FOR US TO AFFORD
THEN WE BUY A BIKINI SET FOR HER AS PRESENT
WAHAHAHAHA,,
I BUY A PAIR OF SHOES and PUI YU ALSO BOUGHT THE SAME AS MINE
COUPLE SHOES..HAHA
THEN,WE TAKE A LRT TO PANDAN JAYA AND WAIT FOR ANENG TO FETCH US
we have our dinner at YULEK
and we have steamboat!!!haha..my favourite
then we went to teacher's hse to take a bath as we are too smelly!!
we went to overtime then,which is near pandan jaya
the girl who sings in the bands was pretty and nice,with a pretty sound too
wow~i was attracted by her~hahaha



那天晚上，我发了个信息给她问她是不是就真的没有了
她回答我对不起。
一切都在2011年里结束吧
至少在2011年的最后一刻
我知道你的答案
我也努力争取我想要的东西
我尽力了，虽然还是失败
但至少我曾经努力、曾经争取
至少我曾经做过一些事
你还是那么任性
还是会跟妈妈吵架
吵架后自己一个人就去马六甲了
真的让人担心
但是，你也是借此机会回去不是吗？
还不懂你吗？
笨蛋~好好的珍惜吧~


2012年了，
还是不敢相信已经是2012年了
不敢相信自己已经是个19岁的女生了
一切都太快了吧
依然怀念那年和你在一起的时候
我不怎么有钱，但却很想买很多东西
或许想发泄吧
刚看到tan的部落各
眼泪又流下
或许感慨、或许遗憾
2011年的我，
到底都做过什么？
我又浪费了一年吗？
悲伤的情绪涌现
这是我不想被人看到的地方
真的很感谢那些陪伴我的朋友
谢谢你们的关心

但是我还是不习惯和朋友买衣服
很害羞~哈哈
那感觉很奇怪
可能习惯了和他出街、和他买衣服
每次他都会自动帮我买衣服、帮我看适合的衣服
因为他知道我不会买衣服、完全不会有距离感
哈哈
可是跟朋友的感觉又不同
不过有一个朋友让我觉得有他陪我买衣服我很安心的感觉
谢谢你，谢谢你们。

在公司上班了有五天吧

或许还不熟悉吧

和同事、工作的步骤都不熟悉

很拘谨、很不自在

有点不想做了

唉~

明天不用上班！！^^

可是要学车~很不想学~

有一天，我梦到一个身边的朋友和我在一起

哈哈~是个梦

为什么梦总是美好的呢？

为什么现实总是残酷的？

我还是会想她，到现在还是会有想流泪的冲动

哈哈

现在的她，很快乐很幸福

那样很好啊~

不知怎么的，我也想有一个

但是，自己是个不怎么会表达的人

真的希望有那个人出现

有时候我会觉得那个人出现了

才发现其实她对每个人都一样

而我也不是特别的那一位

听到她有喜欢的对象时，

心里某个东西沉了下去，

呵呵~

我是怎么啦？